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i still wish i could smell the dogwoods

by Greg Nix

i still wish i could smell the dogwoods
          trapped in office space while hendrix rolls
                            on the speakers
                  next to head

                                        last night i dreamt
                           a thousand lives in succession

    in one i snorted a final line of coke
                visited ex love in harvard
       "going to be great scientist!"
                         old love i said

       i crossed the continent
where i lay in gutters of san francisco
             chewing the babble of poets
    but sober with no coke

                                              an image
                                              i don't recall

         then in newark
       i've never been in newark


                        seemed to be an endless
                                  succession

       lives lies possibilities false starts
                      right turns

                                     another old flame
                                     another tired discussion

this time
       i am brilliant insightful
   historian

                i speak the disease
                i note the pathology
                         this is culture

a plane now
    a distant vision of land beneath
i can taste the lights
       xenon and halogen
               my stomach is an aphrodisiac
                   it is my vulture

                                     sometime in the morning
                               i wake casual to the day
                                    a vision scent of old lost love
                                                 & tastes of dogwood
                                     blossom regret

and who has time for these mornings?
             least   of all    me

                                     shave shower shit smoke

                              & in the car i stare at windshield

                                  myriad blue and brown
                               which is the tobacco sheen that coats

which road to take today
which path matters least?

engine turns over and.


Greg Nix says 'I drink too much coffee and smoke too many damn cigarrettes. An ex told me I was stuck on the image of "writer". Its probably true.' This is his frist appearance at Ariga.

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