Travels through Life by Millie Jackson

LOVE DOESN'T HURT

Everybody will say that love hurts. And I always thought love was to be kind and caring about a person. I think what we expect out of people and believe they are and when we find out they don't live up to our expectations and what we want them to be. Our illusions that causes us to be hurt, the illusion about life and people is what hurts. Expecting too much of people and things and depending on them to make us happy. They can't do that, only we can do that for ourselves. We should never let illusions hurt because that is what they are. It's not facing the truth about people we love. They have to be the person they are and only they themselves can change. They shouldn't have to change to suit us and we shouldn't have to change to suit them. We have to accept them as they are and learn that we could still love them, but to let go and them find their own way, just like we have to find our way, and find what makes us happy.

We shouldn't put pressure on anyone, we need to carry our own responsibility of what will make each of us happy. We are different kinds of people and have the right to see and feel different about things. We should respect each other's feelings and be willing to listen. And let them make their own decisions about their life. It's their life after all. We do not have the right to control the person's life or the way they want to live it. If we can't be compatible with that person's way of life, it's best that we leave it and let go. Because each of us has the right to choose the life we want. Even God gave us a choice.

Love is not about changing a person or trying to make them into something else. It's about letting go and letting them find their own inner self. If that person loses herself and trying to please everybody else, everybody loses. Life is to be traveled, each has a part to play. We should never let love take away the person we are. That's not love. That's wanting someone else to take on your responsibilities in life and to make you happy. She's so busy doing that that she loses herself. If a person begins to lose sight of who she is, and what she needs to make her happy, she becomes a very depressed person. We don't even see at times that what we wanted might not be what the other person needed to make them happy. If we really care about that person we would back off and trust they would figure it out for themselves and they don't need us telling them how to do it. We just need to be supportive of them and love and let go.